Day 5: The heart has so much room for love

Before, I would really stiffen or get snobbish whenever that person is around. Maybe because, I was trying really hard to keep it to myself, and have things done my own way.

Before, my heart was clouded with bitterness, or surrounded by this wall that distances myself from potential persons who would like to explore it.

But I guess, when it hit you, it really does. And no matter what anxiety or fears you have, you just have to admit that you are loving, or at the very least being attracted to someone.

One of the nicest things that happened to me, recently was going back to the catholic community  / group I am part of. You see, I was out of touch for a while -- missing some mission projects or "households" with my sisters. Now, I'm becoming more active again -- participating in worship services, and listening to motivational talks.

During one of The Feast's sessions I have attended, Bro Bo said: 

"Disappointments will always come your way when you expect or seek love from others. With God, that will never happen."

It's a statement that helped me calm this anxious heart. It's always good to admire, to care, and to express love for others. But you cannot expect them to reciprocate it. When you do expect them to love you in return, it will just hurt you. So, instead of focusing on that, why not just love as you love the Lord? It's better that way. "Loving others as a reflection of your love for Him." In this way, things become more at peace, and it gives you more right, more freedom to express your love.

A friend recently revealed a special relationship with another friend. It was something that awed me. In a way, I was kind of expecting that from them, I just didn't want to appear snoopy or something. But anyway, it was a remarkable thing. I admire people who are able to express their love, to the point of not thinking about any differences or any inhibitions. So, to them...you know who you are, always remember to center your relationship on Him :)

As for me, I really yet to know. All I know is that I am admiring somebody. Though I don't have any idea where this will lead me, I am happy. Happy because I know the Lord is giving me opportunities for simple encounters, for simple glances, and for the mere presence :)

@@__________@@